Hotel Aloe Canteras Spain

Escape to Paradise: Hotel Aloe Canteras, Spain - Your Dream Vacation Awaits!

Escape to Paradise: Hotel Aloe Canteras, Spain - …Is it Really Paradise? My Honest, Rambling Review!

Okay, folks, listen up. I'm just back from a stay at the Hotel Aloe Canteras in Gran Canaria, and let me tell you, this isn't your average, sanitized, perfectly-photoshopped review. This is the real deal, warts and all, because let's be honest, sometimes those warts are part of the charm.

First off, the tagline "Your Dream Vacation Awaits!"…bit ambitious, right? But let's dive in, shall we?

First Impressions & Accessibility (Let's Get Real)

The hotel itself, Hotel Aloe Canteras (I'll just call it Aloe from now on), is right on the edge of Las Canteras beach. The location is freaking amazing. Seriously. You walk out and you're practically in the sand. BIG plus.

Accessibility: Now, I didn't personally need a wheelchair during my stay, but I did notice how seriously they took it. The elevator was spacious, and seemed pretty quick - crucial, y'know? The ground floor, with the on-site accessible restaurants/lounges, was very accessible, and I did a walk through of the hotel, and it looks like the Wheelchair accessible rooms seemed to be properly equipped. I even saw ramps where needed. Kudos to them for trying.

Internet: From Bliss to "Ugh"

Wi-Fi [free]…YES! Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!…YES! And then… I spent a solid hour trying to connect in my room, finally resorting to the age-old tactic of wandering around the hallway like a lost soul until I snagged a decent signal. The Internet [LAN]… I didn't even bother with that, felt too old school. Internet services in general were a mixed bag. The lobby Wi-Fi was better, but still not lightning fast. Let's just say I wouldn't recommend this place if you need to live-stream the next SpaceX launch. But hey, you're in paradise, right? Maybe ditch the internet addiction for a few days!

Things to Do, Ways to Relax (and the "Blissful" Spa)

Okay, this is where Aloe really shines. The Swimming pool [outdoor] (and the Pool with a view) is gorgeous. Seriously, Instagram-worthy. The Spa is…well, let's call it a work in progress. The Sauna, Steamroom, and Spa/sauna were decent, the Foot bath was the star I'd say, and the Massage? Okay, let's talk about the massage.

The Massage: A Deep Dive (or a Deep Sigh?)

I booked a massage, dreaming of total relaxation. The therapist? Sweet lady, bless her heart. The massage itself? …Okay, so I'm pretty sure my shoulders are still recovering. It wasn't bad, per se, just…underwhelming? It felt like she was barely touching me at times! I tried to be polite and relaxed, but after an hour of this I tried the old trick of letting out a long sigh and hoping the therapist picked up that I needed more pressure. It worked a bit but probably made the therapist a little confused, I am sorry. Anyway, I'm still searching for that perfect, knock-me-out massage. Still, a Body scrub and Body wrap are available - the real question is will I give it a second try? Hmmmmm.

Fitness Center: If you're into hitting the Gym/fitness, I guess that's cool. Honestly, the beach is your gym, am I right? But for those who really need to crush some weights, they've got stuff for you.

Dining, Drinking & Snacking (Food Glorious Food… Mostly)

Alright, the food. This is where things got interesting. The Breakfast [buffet] was…massive. Buffet in restaurant! - lots of choices! Good for me as I love trying everything in a buffet. I tried the Asian breakfast one day, and thought it was interesting but not for me. The Western breakfast was the safest bet. I really enjoyed the fresh fruit, though. The Coffee/tea in restaurant was plentiful, and the Bottle of water was a welcome sight in the rooms.

The A la carte in restaurant offered some tempting dishes, but there were moments where the Soup in restaurant and the Salad in restaurant was a little bland. The International cuisine in restaurant was certainly… international. There were also Desserts in restaurant that were pretty good, and of course, a Snack bar if you get peckish.

And the Poolside bar? A MUST. Happy hour was a very happy hour. I'll be honest, I may have overdone it on the cocktails a few times, but hey, it's vacation, right?

Room Service [24-hour]? Yes. I think I might have used this! The Breakfast in room option looked like a good idea, but with the buffet, it seemed not as good a value.

Restaurants: Lots of restaurants to choose, as well as Vegetarian restaurant and Asian cuisine in restaurant

On the Food: A Moment to Reflect

I do think I might have struggled to work out what to say about the food…I'm not a big fan of food reviews.

Cleanliness and Safety (COVID-19 Era)

Okay, let's talk COVID. Aloe seemed committed to safety. They had Hand sanitizer everywhere. There were Daily disinfection in common areas and the staff were definitely trained in Staff trained in safety protocol. Anti-viral cleaning products were mentioned, and there was Physical distancing of at least 1 meter. The Rooms sanitized between stays and the Room sanitization opt-out available was good to know. They followed the rules. I mean, they had to, right? So I felt pretty safe but maybe a bit over-sanitized. I'm pretty sure I saw someone nearly slip on the hand sanitiser in the lobby once.

Rooms: My Sanctuary (Kind Of)

The rooms. Ah, the rooms. My room featured a Bathtub, which was pretty nice, a Coffee/tea maker (Complimentary tea!), a Hair dryer, a Refrigerator, a Mini bar to tempt you, and (thank the heavens) a Blackout curtains. The Soundproofing was decent (needed it with the seagulls!), there was the Air conditioning, and a decent seating area to relax. A Desk to put your laptop on.

Available in all rooms: Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens. The Additional toilet was a bonus. I really spent a long time in this room, I didn't want to go anywhere!

Room for Improvement

A few minor gripes: the TV remote had more buttons than I knew what to do with, and I'd have loved a USB charging port by the bed. And the decor…well, let's just say it was functional rather than fashionable.

Services & Conveniences (The Little Things)

The Concierge was helpful, the Doorman always greeted me with a smile. Daily housekeeping kept things tidy (even if I did make a mess). The Cash withdrawal and Currency exchange were useful. There was the Elevator I mentioned. Everything felt pretty relaxed I'd say.

Other Services: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, **Safety deposit boxes

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Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your average itinerary. This is my Hotel Aloe Canteras, Gran Canaria, travel log - a chaotic love letter to sun, sand, and questionable decisions. Prepare yourself, because it’s gonna be wonderfully messy.

Day 1: Arrival and Reality Check (aka, "Where's the bloody beach?")

10:00 AM: Landed at Gran Canaria Airport. Smooth flight? Nope. My luggage decided to take a solo adventure, leaving me with a single toothbrush and the profound existential dread of unpacking later. Still, the sun was glorious, and that immediately erased 80% of my grumpiness.
11:30 AM: Taxi to Hotel Aloe Canteras. Okay, first impressions: the hotel is… well, it's something. The lobby had a vague "tropical retirement home chic" vibe, but the helpfulness of the staff was undeniable. They were already anticipating my lost luggage by the look in their eyes.
12:30 PM: Finally, in my room! (Thankfully, no mold. Always a win.) Balcony view? Stunning. Ocean? Blazing, beckoning, magnificent. Time for a celebratory gulp of lukewarm water out of the tap - which is not to be drunk! "I’m going to get tanned!".
1:00 PM: My first proper attempt to navigate the hotel. The lift, a tiny, antique contraption that sounds like it's constantly on the verge of collapse, has a mind of its own. It’s a good thing I have plenty of time, and patience.
1:30 PM: Lunch at the hotel restaurant. The buffet was an experience. I’m sure it was delicious to some, the options were plenty, but I was so overwhelmed by the sheer amount of food that I ended up with a plate of oddly arranged bread rolls. I just sat at the table and watched people pile food as if they were worried about the end of the world.
2:30 PM: The beach! After a bit of detective work, I finally found the legendary Playa de las Canteras. Oh. My. God. The water was the color of sapphires, the sand was… well, it was sand, but the air! It was a warm, salty, blissful hug. Pure magic.
3:00 PM: Immediately, I felt the need to sit down on the sand. No need to unpack, no need to think, just…be.
3:30 PM: Found a random patch of shade under a palm tree and immediately fell asleep. Woke up covered in sand and feeling marginally better than I did before.
5:00 PM: Back to the hotel, where the reception was a disaster zone of lost luggage, confused guests, and me, wearing my only outfit. The staff gave me a look like I was the victim of a terrible crime. "It's coming!" I said in response, pointing at the sand on my skin.
7:00 PM: Dinner at a local tapas place. The food was incredible, the wine was flowing, and I managed to accidentally order a plate of fried baby squid that tasted like pure, salty happiness. The owner, a boisterous woman with a smile that reached her eyes, kept refilling my glass. I think I’m already in love with this place.
9:00 PM: Back to the hotel, slightly tipsy but blissfully content. The lift, of course, was out of order. Managed to survive the staircase. Wonder how long that will last.
10:00 PM: Fell asleep the second my head hit the pillow.

Day 2: The Ocean's Embrace (aka, "Sunburn and Spiritual Awakening")

8:00 AM: Woke up to a beautiful sunrise and a splitting headache, but I'll fight again. And I'm not using any sunblock.
9:00 AM: Breakfast at the hotel. Surprisingly decent scrambled eggs. The coffee, however, tasted like it had been brewed in a sock.
10:00 AM: Beach day! Found a slightly less crowded spot on the beach, and spent the next few hours swimming in the impossibly blue water. I'm not a very good swimmer, but it did not matter. The ocean's vastness held me, and I was okay. I even did some snorkeling. I saw fish in every color imaginable, darting around coral reefs.
1:00 PM: Lunch at a chiringuito (beach bar). Ordered a grilled fish and a massive jug of sangria. Became best friends with the waiter, a man who went by the name "Jose" which clearly meant "You are one of the lucky ones."
2:00 PM: Sunbathing. This is where things went south, literally. Forgot the sunscreen. Again.
4:00 PM: Back at the hotel, resembling a lobster. The pain! The burn! The regret!
4:30 PM: Began my first proper interaction with the hotel staff. I'm sure they were used to it. They recommended aloe vera, a magical creature of a plant that saved my life.
6:00 PM: Started to feel like I had been beaten up by the sun. It's okay! Aloe vera on the pain.
7:00 PM: Dinner at a restaurant with a terrace overlooking the beach (I needed a change)! Ordered seafood paella. Every bite was heaven. Even better, I met a couple who lived there. They invited me to a wine tasting!
9:00 PM: Wine tasting! I am a wine person now!

Day 3: Exploring and Regrets (aka, "The Day I Became a Professional Bus Rider")

9:00 AM: Today's the day I explore! Decided instead of sitting on the beach and letting the sun eat me to death, I would go into the city!
10:00 AM: Finally, figured out the bus system. Which meant, spending hours wandering between bus stops, getting lost, and accidentally getting on a bus that goes to the airport. I laughed out loud.
10:30 AM: Finally, found the correct bus to the city. I was tired again! But determined! The bus ride was a symphony of slamming doors.
2:00 PM: Finally, arrived at the historical center! It's beautiful, and I'm not sure why I was so tired before, as I was up and down! The architecture, the narrow streets… it's straight out of a postcard. And yes, I'm happy to say that I found a cute little cafe. I ate a delicious pastry and a strong coffee, which gave me the renewed energy.
3:00 PM: Wandering between stores and not buying anything, I went to a street market. Which resulted in me actually buying something!
4:00 PM: I was done. That was enough sightseeing for one day. I went back to the hotel to rest.
6:00 PM: Went to the hotel and immediately went to sleep.
7:00 PM: Found the most amazing burger restaurant, and I ordered fries.
8:00 PM: Back in the hotel!

Day 4-5: The Good, the Bad, and the Sand (aka, "Repeat, Repeat, Repeat!")

Days 4 and 5 were a bit of a blur. Sunbathing, beach time, and lots and lots of food became the schedule during my stay, and I think I will make sure this is the case for my next visit! It's hard to explain how good it was to just be there, and I think I can easily make it better! The only thing is that I was still waiting on my luggage, which made me angry at times. But at the end of the day, the hotel became my family!
Swimming and Reading! A perfect combination!

This itinerary? A work in progress. This trip? An absolute triumph of chaos. Gran Canaria, you've stolen a piece of my heart. And the Hotel Aloe Canteras, well… you're a weird, wonderful, and slightly broken paradise, and I already miss you. (Also, if anyone finds a blue suitcase, please send it my way.) Cheers to the next adventure!

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Escape to Paradise: Hotel Aloe Canteras - Your Dream Vacation Awaits! ... Maybe? Let's See.

Okay, Real Talk: Is This Place Actually Paradise? Or Just, Like, a Decent Hotel?

Alright, listen. "Paradise" is a STRONG word. Let's just say, Hotel Aloe Canteras *leans* towards paradise. It's not the Lost City of Atlantis, okay? My expectations were immediately tempered when, on arrival, the lobby smelled vaguely like... well, like a slightly damp swimming pool, and the air conditioning was blasting so hard I felt like I'd entered a meat locker. (Turns out, the lobby is ALWAYS freezing.)

But! The views? *Chef's kiss*. The beach? Unreal. That volcanic sand is something special. And, crucially, the cocktails they make at the bar? Worth the price of admission ALONE. I'm talking proper, expertly crafted, not-watered-down cocktails. Paradise-adjacent. Definitely. Just... bring a sweater for the lobby.

The Rooms – Are They Actually Chic & Modern, or More... Beige?

Okay, here's the deal. The website photos? *Gorgeous*. Like, super-stylized, influencer-approved gorgeous. The reality? Uh... let's just say, they're perfectly functional. We got a "Sea View" room. Best decision EVER. Waking up to THAT view… pure bliss. The decor? Think "contemporary, but with a slightly faded charm." The bed? Comfortable, but the pillows were, and I kid you not, *lumpy*. Literally the biggest complaint. Lumpy pillows. My wife, being a *princess* about pillows, was nearly inconsolable. I mean, I’m talking about a two-day-long search of other pillows in the building and finally, the cleaning staff rescued us with fluffy feathers which we will be forever grateful for.

My advice? Book sea view, and if you're pillow-sensitive, bring your own.

What's the Food Like? Is it Just Bland Buffet City? Please, No Blandness.

The food. Oh, the food. I am a simple man. I like food. And I wasn't expecting Michelin stars at a beach hotel buffet, honestly. But, and this is a BIG BUT...it was surprisingly good! The breakfast buffet? Top-tier. The pastries? Heavenly... and probably the reason I gained five pounds. The dinner was, in my humble opinion, *chef's kiss*. The Paella? *Mwah*. The fish? Fresh as it gets. The only downside? Every single tourist was fighting over the same small basket of croissants like seagulls at a trash can. I watched a woman literally shove a child aside to get a croissant; it was brutal. The irony? They also offer room service. In short: Go for the food. But brace yourself for the croissant wars.

Is the Pool as Amazing as It Looks in the Photos? And...crowded??

The pool. The photos. The *lies*... partially. It's gorgeous. The water is shimmering, the surroundings are lush... it *is* beautiful. But. But. BUT... it's also a magnet for the *sunbed brigade*. You know, the people who wake up at 6 AM, drop their towels, and then vanish for hours, depriving actual humans of a place to sit and enjoy the sun. The struggle is REAL. I recommend getting down there before 8 AM… or just embracing the beach. The beach is, arguably, better (and much larger).

Honestly, the amount of people who were there early was ridiculous. I tried once, woke up at 7 am, but someone had already claimed all the prime real estate. I was so annoyed I went directly to the bar and started drinking… which, in retrospect, might have been the better option.

What's the Vibe? Relaxed & Chill, or Party Central?

Definitely more relaxed & chill. It's not a Spring Break destination. Think families, couples, and people who appreciate a good book and a sun lounger. There's a bar with live music a few nights a week, and a little "buzz" in the evening, but mostly it's about unwinding. That said, one night, after too many cocktails, I did end up attempting karaoke. (I blame the sangria.) Let's just say, my rendition of "Bohemian Rhapsody" was unforgettable... for all the wrong reasons. My wife, bless her, just shook her head and ordered another drink. (The karaoke was good, though, even if I wasn't).

Any Quirky Observations? Did Anything Annoy You?

Oh, honey, where do I begin? The sheer *amount* of sun cream applications I witnessed was astounding. People would reapply every five minutes. I'm pretty sure I saw a woman practically bathe in the stuff. And don't even get me started on the towel game. I'm convinced people carry around towels simply for the *purpose* of securing a sunbed. The sheer level of strategic planning... I’m a simple man who wants to relax and not fight a towel war, for crying out loud!

Also, the relentless seagulls. They're like tiny, winged villains. They will. Steal. Your. Food. One of them snatched my ham and cheese sandwich right out of my hand. I'm not kidding. It was gone in a FLASH. Lesson learned: guard your snacks, people!

Would You Recommend Hotel Aloe Canteras? And is it worth it?

Okay, the big question! Would I go back? Hmmm. That depends. For the view? ABSOLUTELY. For those sunset drinks? *Definitely*. For the food? Yes, but with a healthy dose of Croissant War paranoia. For flawless perfection? Probably not. Honestly? It's a solid choice. It’s not without its little quirks and annoyances, and maybe it's not a 10/10. Maybe an 8/10. It's very, very, enjoyable. It gave me the relaxation I needed. I came back home with a tan, a full belly, and a story to tell, and isn't that what a vacation is all about? I'll take it. I recommend it. Book it. Just… pack extra towels. And be prepared, the lobby is chilly.

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Escape to Paradise: Hotel Aloe Canteras, Spain - Your Dream Vacation Awaits!